College Feminists Connect!

Blue Waffles: Perpetuating the 'Vagina of the Patriarchy' One Breakfast at a Time

Did you know waffle is slang for vagina? Interesting. I never would have thought of a vagina while eating waffles. It's quite nonsensical as slang terms go; which is fitting because the newest "STD" on the radar is equally nonsensical. Information about "blue waffle disease" has apparently been circulating around the internet since 2010 - but I just caught wind of it this weekend by reading an article from the Women's Health Foundation.

What, might you ask, is "blue waffle disease"? I thought the best definition was on UrbanDictionary.com, but essentially it is a (FAKE) STD which can only be passed from females to males, manifests mainly through blue bruises on the vulva, and is a result of bad vaginal hygiene. It is also worth noting that most people who believe this disease is real are pre-teens or teenagers who are seeking sexual health information from illegitimate internet websites like this one or this one.

When I originally read the article I was concerned about misinformation and the pitfalls of sex education in America. I wasn't overly concerned with the misogynistic or patriarchal implications of this fabricated disease. Misogyny and patriarchy were present (one day everyone will understand vaginas are not dirty) but the ever present "dirty vagina" idea was less a concern for me than the fact that kids across the country actually believe in this STD. That was until I started my own mini-research on blue waffle disease and realized the whole STD is apparently an excuse to put women in their place sexually while simultaneously getting them to emulate what I will call the "vagina of the patriarchy".

The vagina of the patriarchy is white, hairless, perfectly symmetrical, doesn't have any discharge, and exists for the purpose of heterosexual intercourse - but not too much heterosexual intercourse. Oh, and let's not forget about the tones of slut shaming and sexual violence present in the "information" about this disease. Here are some samples (and those typos are not my own):

"The disease is typically observed in prostitutes and whores who indulge in activities of Unsafe sex, who use of sex toys and prostitution are the main cause of disease."

"Blue waffle is a vaginal abnormality caused by severe beatings at the hand of the man-stick, excessive ferocious poundings can results in grotesque flap growth resembling a waffly versatile potato waffle but also taking on a bluey-green colour. Often covered in sweaty fur as a result of the skanky mess who owns the vagina being crap at personal hygene.. mingers."

Because whoever wrote the first quote is likely an ignorant moron let's assume they are talking about street prostitution - not one of the many other types of prostitution (i.e. call girls). See, women who practice street prostitution do not indulge in unsafe sex. Usually, they are forced either economically or physically to engage in prostitution. It is not a choice or a reflection of their character but a method of survival. Oh, and fun fact: female street prostitutes are disproportionately of "lower" socioeconomic statuses. But the men who visit them typically represent every socioeconomic status. Hmmm....street prostitutes wouldn't be "indulging" if there was no one to do it with. Perhaps the problem is not with the supplier but with the demand.

Now on to the second quote, which is slightly more disturbing and problematic because of it's blatant promotion of violence against women. Apparently "severe beatings at the hand of the man-stick" and "excessive ferocious poundings" is code for sex. In reality, if your vagina is getting "beat by a man-stick" it's probably sexual assault. But in this quote, instead of offering the sexual assault survivor aid, they continue on to blame them for being a whore and allowing all those men to give them blue waffle disease. Funny how the men are inflicting the pain and disease here but the woman is getting blamed.

One purpose of these examples is to define female sexuality in negative terms: good women do not have multiple sex partners, they do not use sex toys, and they do not have hair on their vulva. The other purpose is to frighten women into behaving according to these narrow patriarchal standards. The second quote blatantly describes sexual violence and effectively blames women for its repercussions.

So, what I originally thought was just a bad case of some idiot making up a disease and misinforming a bunch of teenagers actually turns out to be a huge hurdle in regards to sexual violence and positive female sexuality. You know what a thirteen year old girl will think if she comes across this "information"? Hint: it's not going to be a complex analysis of patriarchal definitions of sexuality and incidences of sexual violence.

So spread the word - let's defeat "blue waffle disease" in all it's patriarchal glory. -Jen Kaltveit, Hamline University

Let's Talk About Being Pro-Choice

The legislative session of 2011 was fraught with ridiculous attacks on reproductive rights. Limiting access to abortion is a hot issue right now - and abstinence only education is (and likely will be for the foreseeable future) a problem in regards to how people are educated about sex.

When you feel so strongly about an issue it can be difficult to see clearly when people constantly attack it. Reproductive rights are such an intense topic for everyone because they are so personal. I cannot imagine someone telling me I can't have access to birth control or adequate information about sex. And those who are not so liberal as I can't imagine talking about such a holy and personal topic as sexuality in the public realm. Personal, right? This issue goes right to the core of almost everyone's personal behavior and identities. It makes sense for people to be so passionate.

But with passion comes problems. Problems like not looking at an issue from all sides. Problems like not considering several opinions and understanding (though not necessarily agreeing) with opposing viewpoints. Some people struggle to  maintain a logical standpoint and argument to back up that standpoint. And here's the thing - lately I see my pro-choice comrades falling into that "passion trap". We're under attack - and it doesn't just feel like our ideas are being attacked - it feels like our bodies and our reproductive freedom is being attacked. It's quite the unpleasant situation. I understand why people feel the need to protect reproductive rights more than ever before - it's scary to think some of the bills being proposed could become law (remember the Personhood Amendment?) but that is no excuse to become narrow minded, even if it is on the pro-choice side of things.

It started in the blogs I read, then it showed up in my classes, and now it's appearing in pop-culture analysis. It's an intense attitude of disdain for women who exercise their right to choose. The women who are scorned (whether real or characters in a book, TV show, or movie) either become pregnant and decide to have the baby or decide to opt for a birth control method like Natural Family Planning. And they are scorned implicity or explicity for not having an abortion or not using birth control. See, I was under the impression pro-choice was about having access to the choice. Being able to have an abortion safely and using birth control or not having an abortion and using (for lack of a better word) "natural" methods of birth control. As pro-choicers we CANNOT scorn those women who do not make the choices we would have made. Pro-choice should not end at access to birth control and safe abortion. It needs to include resources for women and men who choose to remain pregnant or practice Natural Family Planning.

It is narrow minded, and frankly, detrimental to the fight for reproductive rights to scorn women and men who do not use birth control or abortion. What everyone does with their body is their business. We need to recognize that the pro-choice movement could fall into a narrow minded, birth control filled black hole. We need to stand strong and form bonds with those who believe in personal freedom - but perhaps don't make the same choices in regards to their person as you would. We need to be the real embodiment of pro-choice. -Jen Kaltveit, Hamline University

An Awesome Opportunity: Go, Girls Go!

The Women’s Center over at St. Cloud State University has been busy all summer. We’ve been brainstorming and planning for the coming semesters and we have quite a few fun, interesting, and cool things in store for SCSU campus and surrounding communities.

Aside from our (top secret) planning, we’ve been asked by a local Boys and Girls Club to organize an afternoon for a group of young girls (ages K-4). The young girls are a part a group called, Go, Girls Go!; a young girl’s summer empowerment group focusing on creating positive body image/self esteem, cultivating and inspiring personal growth and independence. Needless to say, this group of young girls is definitely creating their destiny in feminism, and that couldn’t make me or the ladies at Women’s Center any happier.

Obviously, the Women’s Center agreed to take on this opportunity with a resounding, “YES!”, but at the same time we were all puzzled and curious as to how we were going to keep 15 girl’s attention for over an hour. I mean, come on, since when are college students used to working/collaborating with children when it’s not required for class? Never, that’s when, but we were all eager to find the perfect activity and create conversation surrounding positive body image and self esteem, which was the theme we decided to go with.

When brainstorming, I couldn’t help but think about my little nieces (ages 10, 9, 7, and 5) and what types of activities they would be receptive to – and then I thought of a conversation that was had a few months ago involving said body image topic.

Babysitting these girls is always such a treat.  They're always teaching me new things and never fail to keep me informed on "what's cool" now-a-days (because apparently, I'm old and totally out of the loop).

Women's Studies, Now What?

If you are a women's studies major, you've no doubt been asked by strangers, friends, or parents what kind of job you can expect to get with your degree. And for many of us, we've also asked ourselves this very question. Macalester College alum and past MN Womens' Consortium intern, Shiveta, recently sent College Feminists Connect a link to a Ms. Magazine article called Transform the World that discusses the social justice work women's stuides majors are doing on the job by not only bringng unique skills and critical thinking to the workplace but also by bridging the gap between feminist theory and practice.

In my effort to defend my women's studies degree to the world, including many feminists, I have tried to explain how women's studies is one of the only academic disciplines that I see incorporating hands on social justice experience as well as the complex intersections of oppression.

"[Researchers] found that the fact that women’s studies majors and graduates were persistently asked what could be done with their degrees reflected a continuing ignorance about women’s studies as an academic discipline. In their study, Luebke and Reilly were also able to document a unique set of skills learned through women’s studies programs: empowerment, self-confidence, critical thinking, building community, and understanding differences and intersections among racism, homophobia, sexism, classism, ableism, anti-Semitism and other types of oppression."

Furthermore, as women studies majors bring these unique skills to the workplace and the global world they have gone beyond bridging the gap between theory and practice and have began building bridges to different job sectors.

"Deborah Siegel, author of the forth-coming book Sisterhood, Interrupted: From Radical Women to Grrls Gone Wild, has noticed the same thing. She observes that in the 1970s, 'women’s studies was about bridging the divide between scholarship and activism. This current generation is bridging scholarship, activism and media."

The article focuses on the sentiment that while women's studies isn't so much about securing a job after college and is more about transforming the world through feminist perspective, it also provides concrete examples of what jobs women's studies majors are doing.